Friday, November 09, 2007
Deep Thoughts Inspired By O’Malley Jane
All this week I have made it a point to wake up on time and have a morning devotional. This consists of a selection of chapters from the Bible (2 Kings 1-3 today) that go along with a reading in the HMS Richards’ Bible in a Year book while listening to the SoundScapes channel on TV and having O’Malley contentedly purring on my lap. This last part is a treat. O’Malley is very finicky about when she will and won’t sit on my lap or nap with me. There are times that I make this decision for her, but she quickly shows her distaste of being forced to do anything. This got me to thinking. I love O’Malley like no one else. I hate being away from her for even a night. I’m sure that those of you with spouses and/or children of any kind know what I mean. And I know that O’Malley cares for her momma. She likes to be in the same room as me even if she is no where near me in that room. While this is good, I would still like more from her. I would love it if she would sleep next to me every night and curl up on my lap or play the entire time I’m home. I must admit it’s been hard for me that she only sleeps on the bed when I pull her up for Sabbath naps and even then, I have to force her on the bed but once there she is ready to cuddle. So back to the thinking: This must be how God feels about us. He loves us more than we could ever love Him. He wants us to spend time with Him, but we want it on our terms. We like to spend our time our way. Sure we’ll come up in His lap for church and other worship events, but after all that lap sitting we get up, stretch our legs and run off to do our own thing forgetting that He is still there waiting for us, wanting us. Even when we have the best intentions, we somehow manage to hurt Him with are carelessness. (I relate this to how O'Malley forgets how much her claws hurt when we are playing and then I have to stop playing because she has torn a chunk of flesh from my finger. She doesn't mean to hurt me, it's just a part of her nature like sin is a part of ours.) While God doesn’t want to force us to spend time with Him, there are times that He puts situations in our life that remind us that we WANT to be with Him. Now, if only I could stop being selfish and place my will in God’s hands daily. I want to want a close relationship with God but I am horrible with follow through in all of the relationships in my life. Being a visual person, I wrestle with His intangibility--not hearing God and not being able to see the path that He sees for me. I can't just call Him up and ask for advice like I can with my friends and family. I can't hug Him to show my appreciation and care. I pray every day that God will make me want to be the person He wants me to be and show me how to do it.